Talking about it

“I think probably the most important bit of it is to try and make sure you talk to someone, it doesn't even have to be a psychologist, it could just be somebody who’s there for you, just talking to my friends and talking to my family really helped me.”

Talking about what has happened might sound like a simplistic solution but many parents involved in the development of this website spoke about how it important and helpful it was for them, even though it could be difficult and sometimes emotionally painful to do so. It can be hard to build up the courage to talk to someone, but telling someone you trust about how you’re feeling can help in different ways.

“As blokes we’re supposed to be the hard ones and not supposed to talk about it. I mean, when you talk to people, you talk quite factually. Like, she’s got a burn on her shoulder, her mum did the right thing she was straight in the shower and then we were down the hospital within however many minutes. You’re quite factual about what happened. We’re not supposed to be emotional. That how you’re brought up, you’re supposed to be all tough, but you definitively still feel it.”

Talking about what happened can help you to:

Sort through your feelings

Talking about what you are thinking and feeling, and explaining it to someone else, even if you don’t think it makes much sense, can help you to clarify what is worrying you. Saying it out loud, or writing it down, can make it feel less scary and help you to see exactly what you are having to deal with, whether that be your child’s treatment, the impact on the family, or financial or employment concerns.

Put things into perspective

Keeping your thoughts to yourself can make situations seem much more overwhelming than they are. When you tell someone how you are feeling, they might be able to help by giving you advice, practical support, or by helping you to see the situation with a new or different perspective.

Release tension

Stress and worrying creates a lot of physical tension. You might notice that you feel more relaxed, or at least experience a release of tension, when you talk to someone.

“In those early days just talk to somebody, be it family, anyone… Ease yourself of that guilt by just talking about it”

If you want to talk to someone who is not a friend or family member, click here to find out where you can find support.

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